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Ghost Faced Killer - These farts come from nowhere when it seems no one is around, and it kills all life around the stench.
The Earthquake - One giant fart that is followed by several smaller "aftershocks."
The Sonic Boom - The name talks for itself. This one is incredibly loud, but often has little smell.
The H.S.S. - This Hot Steamy and Smelly fart, is the smelliest of them all. The more quiet and juicy it is, the more powerful smell. (these also leave that "brown racing stripe" on occasion)
The Clinger - This fart smells bad, but sticks around for a minimum of 3 hours.
The Machine Gun - Goes off very slow pop... pop... pop... pop... POW!
Sudden Death - These are the farts that cannot be held. They must be released. The longer you try to hold them, the skinkier they will get.
Surprise Ending - This kind of fart is common in elderly people. I starts as a long constand fart, but hits a high note at the end.
The Wallet Frog - The civilized thing to call a normal fart while in public.
TYPES OF POOP:
Ghost Poop - The kind where you feel the poop come out, but there is no poop in the toilet.
Second Wave Poop - You're done pooping and you've pulled your pants up to your knees, then realize you have to poop some more.
Gassy Poop - It's so noisy, everyone within earshot is giggling.
Tough Poop - It's so wide, it won't go down untill it leaves marks at the bottom of your toilet.
Corn Poop - Self explanitory
Pop-A-Vein-In-Your-Forehead Poop - You strain so much to get it out, you nearly have a stroke.
Lincoln Log Poop - This poop is so huge you're afraid to flush without first breaking it into smaller pieces with the toilet brush.
High Society Poop - The kind that doesn't smell.
Surprise Poop - You're not even at the toilet because you're certain you are only going to fart, sneeze, or cough.
Clean Poop - You poop it out, you see it in the toilet, but there is nothing on the toilet paper.
Wet Poop - You wipe your butt 50 times and it still feels unwiped, so you put some toilet paper between your butt and your underwear so you prevent them with a "brown racing stripe" stain.
The Dangling Poop - It refuses to break off and drop in the toilet even though you know you're done pooping it. You almost have to jiggle it to get it loose.
Gee-I-Wish-I-Could-Poop Poop - You want to poop, but all you can do is sit and fart a few times.
Spinal Tap Poop - It hurts so bad, you're afraid it's coming out sideways.
Wet Cheeks Poop - A.K.A. The Power Dump - It comes out so fast and in such a large mass, your butt is splashed with water.
Liquid Poop - Yellowish-brown liquid shoots out your butt and splashes all over the toilet bowl.
Mexican Poop - It smells so bad your nose and eyes burn.
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